Mine hit me with the “We’re spending all this money on you now so you can’t grow up and say we didn’t spend money on you when your were a kid.”
Two weeks after I explained to my father why I had an abortion … and he calmly said he understood my reasons … he told me I’d murdered his grandchild.
He was a real winner, my dad.
I’m so sorry he responded like that, he’s not the one who would have carried, birthed, and raised that child. I hope you’re doing okay and are at peace with the decision you made.
Thanks. I’m good. I thought long and hard about it beforehand because I didn’t want to regret my decision.
I was talking to my father about the war in Palestine (my family and I are Jewish so its not unusual). I said “hey maybe peace is a better way of combatting terrorism”, he responded that concentration camps should be built to combat terrorism and strip the Palestinians of their culture and identity.
“When education isn’t liberating, the dream of the oppressed is to become the oppressor” - Paulo Freire
Excellent quote and deeply, tragically profound.
l’ve noticed the modern philosophizing kids have distilled this mentality down to the mocking phrase:
“One day I’ll get to be the one wearing the boot! :D”
It’s an extremely unfortunate quote especially when you consider the context of Paulo Freire’s work: he was an educator that understood that teaching should not be an assembly line even back in 1960s, when the adult illiterate population was very large. One of his feats was coming with with a method that successfully meshed adults’ livelihoods and work as means to teach them how to read and write in record time. To the country’s despair, the 1964 coup killed any chance of his method being applied nationwide. He was jailed for a bit over 2 months as “traitor” then had to exile himself.
Yet, to this day, he’s demonized by the political right as a subversive communist and the main “culprit”, according to them, for the failures of our education system (“they only teach ideology at schools and universities!!!”), despite his methods only ever being applied in very limited places and times.
conservatives never going to schools love to say that about schools, but are silent on christian only schools.
Hypocrisy is their specialty
Man, I love that quote. I hadn’t seen it before.
I’m pretty skeptical anyone has the answer on how to educate in the way that’s being implied, though. Humans love to hate.
Thats sadly what happened to my people
The monster that raised me was a real piece of work.
Context: she adopted me and 3 others. The other 3 were adopted when she was a single parent.
- “I didn’t want you. <ex husband> did.”
- “Stick to your own kind.” (In front of my mixed-ethnicity siblings, when I introduced a girl I was seeing to her)
- ”Ain’t no son of mine is going to be a <slur>” (all 3 of my siblings had developmental disorders, I only asked to be tested)
- “I don’t want that <homophobic slur> in my house no more, I don’t want AIDS”
- “If you really hate me that much go back to your whore mother, she didn’t want you either”
- ”Nobody wants you, I don’t even want you.” (She used this one a lot)
- ”Where would you be if I didn’t take you in?” (Also used this one a lot)
- ”Read. My. Lips.” (I had moderate to severe hearing loss back then, and she refused to learn sign language. She would also get right in my face when she did that)
- ”You a <homophobic slur> now?” (When I pierced both of my ears)
- ”If you move out don’t ever come back, don’t call me, don’t talk to me, don’t ask me for diggity shit”
That last one was fun. I met my partner and snuck out in the middle of the night to fly across the world just to get away from her. She reported me as kidnapped multiple times even after I contacted the detectives AND her to let her know I was only following instructions. Then she denied she ever said that. That was the last time I spoke to her, over a decade ago.
I’m in therapy twice a week for the past few years, was recently diagnosed with adhd and autism, and non-binary transfem. My partner is Indonesian. She can rot in piss.
yeah. the majority of stuff they’d say was like that, in fact. it’s part of why i don’t talk to them anymore lol
Yes. My mom, unprompted one day, said:
“Did you guys know that Elon Musk’s Dad owns an emerald mine?”
Followed by me saying “yes, did you also know he used slave labor in apartheid South Africa to build it?”
“Well I don’t really care about any of that. I just thought it was cool.”
It’s brutal when the mask inevitably comes off and you realise that your parents, who were once like gods, are in fact retarded.
Slightly tangential, but it’s beyond any reason that her and my dad can read the exact same Bible and parse different meanings from it. My dad is the least judgmental, least preachy Christian I know. She missed the memo, it seems.
45,000 + denominations of Christianity. Bound to be one or two differences.
True Christians leave the judgement to God. Your dad’s one of the good ones.
😩😭😭, No it’s the worst. To find out that your parents are in fact retarded. They lack common sense, and they are just simply not able to learn about anything in regards to subjects or topics. Oh and don’t get my started on a one narrative regurgitated MSM news that spit out lies and shit. They are just stupid and easily brainwashed and have no common sense. They live in their own delusional bubble.
That’s a cop out. It’s not stupidity. It’s hate.
I think to some extent hate is born of stupidity, certainly fear. Probably a combination of both, fear and stupidity = hate.
thats how conservatives think, they selective hear what they want to hear.
Yep, that would be hard to respond to. WTF.
- you are pathetic
- you make me want to vomit
- you are disgusting
- you are a disloyal, condescending asshole
- you are sickening
- I can’t wait until I no longer have to be around you
Borderline Personality Disorder is not a ride I ever asked to be on.
While writing my master thesis my professor suddenly left the university. Noone ever really knew why and there was no official statement other than a short sentence on the website that Prof. XYZ has left the department. My master thesis was on hold while I had to find a new professor. My mother, who has always accused me of being lazy and lying, insisted that it was all a lie. When I pointed out the news on the university website, she said: “I don’t know how you hacked the website and got it to display your lies, but I’m not falling for your deceit.” I am not a computer science major, I studied linguistics.
I am not a computer science major, I studied linguistics.
We’re not falling for your deceit, Noam Chomsky. You probably used some context-free grammar to hack the website.
You’re in a masters program and your mom thinks you’re lazy…
Well, according to her, university degrees are all worthless nowadays and “a masters is at a level a high school degree used to be at”. She also told me my As were worthless because “everybody gets an A nowadays just for showing up to class”.
I have a lot of respect for you! Keep being motivated and being ambitious!
What are you supposed to do? Is there anything you could do that would be valuable in her eyes?
Nope. I’ve been no contact for years, but when I still had contact, she just kept moving the goalpost. When I had good grades in school: They don’t mean anything, only the grades for Abitur (A-Levels) count. When I had good grades in Abitur: It means nothing, noone will ever ask for your Abitur grades again. Only the university degree counts. When I had my bachelors: Bachelor is worthless, only the master is a REAL degree. When I had my master degree: The master degree is worthless… And that’s the point where I cut contact with her.
“What do you mean you’re working? You’re just sitting in your room all day.”
just like the trope of asian parents, not good enough.
don’t we love a trusting parent
My dad, the tech genius that he is, has been against every minor step forward since the 90’s:
“Why do i need an answering machine, if they need me, they’ll call back.” He worked for himself as a handyman, so this is plain ridiculous. Finally, someone gives him an answering machine and suddenly it’s “This is awesome! I never miss a call! I’ve got so much work!” Later it was “Why do I need a debit card? I can just write a check!” which evolved to “It’s so convenient! I can get gas, even when they’re closed!” He repeated the answering machine argument when cell phones arrived, and repeated the results when he finally got one.
It’s a running theme in his life. The one that really gobsmacked me was when he proudly declared “the Internet can’t hurt me if i don’t get on it!”
I think the saddest part about this is the phenomenon where people who didn’t understand tech were scared of new stuff that was actually really neat and helpful…
…and nowadays they’re ridiculously trusting of shiny user-friendly corporate garbage that spies on them and manipulates them.
Hilariously relevant username, considering I was just going to reply with a “we’re too far from swinging in the trees now to handle it”.
Haha yay, first time I got a “username checks out”! :D hahaha.
Reject predatory techbro products, return to monke! XD
Just last week I was re-patching some nasty piece of business logic at a client for a day and remembered the application “Filter Top” from the nineties, where I solved a similar (but slightly simpler) problem on a far inferior less advanced platform in a few minutes with a GUI even.
Return to monke. I’m with you.
“the Internet can’t hurt me if i don’t get on it!”
Wise words, old man. o7
I fought against getting a contactless debit card for so long. I used to call my bank a month or so before my card expired demanding a non-contactless card. “But sir, you could just not activate the contact…” I don’t want any of it. I’d say “when I forget my pin it’s time to go home” paying chip and PIN like a peasant. I probably said “PIN Number” for how stupid I was being.
Anyway, contactless payment is awesome.
My fears are still grounded. Originally it was because, near weekly, I saw someone paying with a card they just picked off the floor. I hated the limit being so high long before they raised it, let alon after they raised it again. Also a skill check before ordering another beer has some merit.
i went tapa nd pay with CC recently, because i was still using the sliding feature for the longest time, because cc stealers can easily put on thier readers in a matter of seconds you wouldnt know.
So when you walk up to a terminal with your Visa and you tap your card it inputs a one time code. That code only matches up on the point of sale/banks end. If they take the same code and try to transmit it at say Wendy’s, it won’t work, as it has already been used. If someone swipes your card with a magnetic strip, or reads the numbers off manually and enters them online/in person/or over the phone the information will stay the same and can be used at elsewhere.
Most of the anti tap worries are unfounded fear. Also the terminals that allow payments for two to pay also get registered so if someone steals a terminal to modify it, the terminal would be reported stolen by the owner, or if the terminal was purchased by the theif, it would have to be registered by them, and once again can get an investigation pointed in their direction fairly quickly. Is it possible to beat, I’m sure, but it’s MUCH easier to just jot down the numbers or skim thee strip
Tell me you’re American without telling me you’re American. That hasn’t been an option where I am for nearly 2 decades.
A few days ago my mom made a “joke” that clearly having good kids skipped a generation right after commenting about how well behaved my kids were.
With my own kids now I’ve been realizing how many of the “behaviors” my parents would complain about and expect me to improve upon were just normal kid stuff
“must be good parenting skipped a generation”
one time when I was little I heard my mum making weird noises in her room. i didn’t go check why. the next morning i asked her why were you making weird noises? she said “I was imagining eating Chinese food that was so good”
She was flicking the bean, wasn’t she?
What, a woman can’t enjoy imagining a succulent Chinese meal?
Get your hands off my clitoris!
even at the time I was sceptical lol
Savouring the hot dog
Slurping the ramen broth
My grandparents came to the US from Germany. Upon hearing my dad say black people that don’t like trumps (1.0) America should go back to Africa, i reminded him that most of them are way more American than we are. I could hear his brain break through the phone
When I was little, I did something bad (I don’t even remember what it was), and my mom got angry with me about it, and I was already crying, and I asked her “Do you still love me?” and she said “I don’t know”, and that shit has stuck with me forever and I’m sure contributes to the fact that I don’t truly trust anyone. If I brought it up to her now, she’d 100% deny it.
If I brought it up to her now, she’d 100% deny it
The axe forgets; the tree remembers. It’s why we should be far, far more careful than we usually are about throwing around things like that.
That’s rough. I still love you, pal.
Aw, thanks, guy.
Call me buddy, friend.
Light that gas right up, mom.
My dad recently buult a new garden shed in the garden for tools and gardening stuff. He now started refering to the gazebo in the same garden as “the old shed” for some fucking reason. We were doing something that required power and ge asked me to plug in an extension in the shed. I do that and a couple minutes later he berates me and says he meant the old shed. When I asked if he meant the gazebo, he looked at me as if I had slapped him in the face. We’ve had the gazebo for about 15 years now I think and nobody ever called anything but that.
Beware The Dread Gazebo!!!
Damn.
My step father told me about the time he told my biological father that he had slept with my mom.
I was a small child and we were all living in a house together, my mom, biological father and step father(my bio dads bff at the time). Step father took my bio father out and told him what they had done. My bio father was so happy to hear the news he shook my step father’s hand and thanked him profusely. He then proceeded to tell my step father how he wanted to burn the house down with me and my mom in it so this is the best news he could possibly get.
After my step father told me this story he followed it up with “at that moment I should have known and left your mother” 🫠
** record scratch noises **
I’m guessing your Mom is now on ‘team Bear’.
I would consider that your Mom is the problem here except that the dudes lumped you in with being burned alive, and that suggests they are the PoS.
Lol she’s on team dead and yes.
My dad said various things about “dirty Mexicans”, eugenic stuff about black people or people with severe mental handicaps, and always had some offhand extreme solution for non-conformists who rocked the boat.
He kept it mostly under wraps when I was younger, but as he got older and the Fox News worm ate into his and his social circle’s brains it started leaking out a lot more.
Being sent off to “military school” was an occasional threat. Like that was going to magically fix things.
