If the world was some simulation, if you feel that you are a real bag of flesh and are able to feel conscuous, free will, etc. then it doesn’t really matter if the universe is a simulation in my opinion It would explain a lot though. Sometimes I completely forget what I was going to do/find in a room right after I entered it, which could easily be explained by someone high above pulling a funny prank on the flesh bags.

It sounds like depersonalisation to me. A form of dissociation.

Lots of trans people deal with it when they’re closeted. I know I did.

I don’t feel important enough for that. Same reason I’m not religious. People claiming a personal relationship with the goddamn creator of the universe are hella conceited.

Locus of Control

I don’t feel like my life is scripted per se, but sometimes I’ll be talking to someone and all of the sudden it feels like someone else has taken control of my body and is doing all the talking while I just sit back and watch. I have to concentrate to get back in control.

i think this is a common side effect of being self aware

little existential crises before getting back into life

Neurology tells us that we make decisions before we’re consciously aware that we made them.

I felt that specifically on an anti-seizure drug that I used to stop familial tremors. Almost as if someone was walking in my body and doing everything 5 seconds before I knew what was happening. It’s not abnormal, but it can feel remarkably disconcerting to believe you no longer have agency of your own body. Sorry for that, homeslice, but don’t be too concerned.

Is a parent or grandparent in your family a narcissist? That crud does trickle down.

• https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ha7EwIAwoqM

Not really. A lot of it is just happenstances and inconvenient coincidences.

I do have some themes going in my life though that could make it seem that way.

• Anytime I get something good or things are looking too good to be true, there’s always something horrible or bad waiting around the corner to ruin that momentum.

• Anytime I am randomly crying or completely angry, it sometimes can mean someone I know is either dead or suffering as proven from the times I got emotional to eventually find an obituary of someone I knew who died.

• Irony loves to rear its head in my life now and then. In the past whenever I’ve said I never wanted to work at a fast food company, I ended up working at one.

• Anytime I am out to get one thing or do one thing such as a single errand, it always turns out to be the most frustrating experience ever. For example, if I needed to go out and grab one product I forgot to get or needed to get, I’ll end up having to store-hop several stores before finally getting it and during that whole trip, I’m dealing with dumbass drivers and even dumber pedestrians. As well as dealing with idiotic shoppers too.

• Anytime I needed something for emergency situations or to double-check something to be sure of it, suddenly the services I use are not available or down for maintenance.

• Currently, I’m dealing with a series of matters that consist of things requiring me to put more effort into them. Like having to double-click things for buttons that are usually one-click or fighting with things that appear to be broken when they worked flawlessly before.

I don’t feel like it’s scripted and that’s slightly worrying. I feel like a plank of wood being tossed about by the sea in a storm. At least with a benevolent god, one can assume that the suffering of life has a purpose. The older I get and the more evil I see prospering, the less confident I feel that there’s a point to it all. This depresses and mildly frightens me.

If the world seems unreal & you feel like you’re watching yourself play a role in a movie rather than living your life, then that might be a psychiatric disorder worth evaluation by a professional. It’s normal on occasions, but not beyond that it interferes with your regular ability to function.

Not really, mine is pretty random and based on choices I made in the past

Yeah, a bit. My life is one of those shows where when something’s finally going right it immediately gets undercut and everything falls apart

Tbh some of those incredible downturns in my life couldn’t be better scripted if you tried

Last night I turned off a small metalic lamp that’s next to my bed. I then heard a tapping sound like a small dripping water hitting the metalic lamp.

I turned the lamp on. I saw no water. The tapping stopped. I looked at the ceiling. No sign of water. I looked at the lamp. No water. Turned the light back off. Rolled back over, and got comfy.

Tap…tap…tap…

Turned the light back on. Tapping stopped. Still no water.

Turned the light off. The second the light was off, I heard the tap again.

Turned it back on. Still no water.

Got up, got out of bed, checked all around my night stand. Checked behind it. Nothing out of the ordinary.

While standing next to the bed, turned the light off. Tapping resumed.

Turned the light back on, and walked to the living room. Layed down on the couch.

Light on in the bedroom. I’m in the living room. Turn the living room light off.

Now there’s tapping inside the pipes inside the walls. Totally different tap. Totally different place. Totally different tapping sound. This didn’t sound like dripping water. This sounded like someone hitting the pipes with a wooden spoon with the same cadence.

Tap…tap…tap…

But it always stopped when I turned the light on.

So I went into the bathroom, and took a shower.

Now, here’s the kicker. I live alone. I have no pets. I have no rodents in the walls.

The whole thing came off like someone playing a prank on me. Except that person didn’t exist. It felt like I was living some 1930s comedy skit. Some Abbot and Costello skit. Except this is just me, alone in my apartment, going insane.