Forgot about prehensile eye stalks and stank glands, tho

Also cloacal vent ridges. Lots of those

My wife works at an elementary school and keeps doing it, then apologizing and saying she’s on autopilot and I believe her. When I see my mother she does it to annoy me as is her right as matriarch. Right when they’re done doing it, I’m gonna start omg it is so stupid.

this is the exact kind of prank i’d pull on my family except they’re all logged into the same accounts i am. and i’m too broke to afford a second doordash.

yeah we got a few kinds of pools balls here. specificity would just be no fun though would it at this point.
apparently these exist

see if they’re dry

i was on the way to the pet store later tonight (to get a therapeutic bag of kitty litter to ragepunch) and you may have just saved me from getting catscratched

uh that was meant for somenoen else

uh, no not really actually but i got it covered. the damn shipment is just one day late. AGAIN. I appreciate you asking.

my veins have always had good return when giving samples, and this was in the big through your elbow vein. antecubital. my preferred placement is basilic. the large looking mid-forearm pinky close to the elbow but not too close to it i can still move my arm without pinching the cath or hitting a valve. I thinkthat’s antecubital and the basilic but it has been a long time sing i taught myself anatomy.

as far as volume and force and velocity and delta vee i guess this was excessive even for me. i know there’s some blood thinner (warfarin i’m guessing) coating around a lot of IV catheters to help them last a little longer, but all i can explain is we used a larger cath (20 instead of 16) because i was really dehydrated when i arrived and i had just gotten pumped with probably 6 liters of saline because that was the last time my kidneys were going to feel sated until the next time my shitter got jammed.

It’s six times nine

oh yeah sorry. i got some Stasesianisms littered through my speech

i should get some glasses that have a third eye

we were working toward a way for a world without nukes. building an economy so interconnected that going to war with another country destroys your economy too. but that shit is fragile. i didn’t think it was this fragile tho.

part of why i use a mobility device is that i can use it to bang on vehicles and alert them of my presence without kicking/hitting it with my bones, in sitiations just like you describe. a sock full of pool balls would also work.

i have to say tho, as another forced pedestrian, the best thing for my getting around has been getting a recumbent trike.

gonna be honest, emergencies happen.

no you don’t egg

or end up Robocop scene 27ing (don’t watch that unless you’re prepared to see a whole lot of dick get shot off)

just tourniquet the neck, right?

there’s a similar one on your arm. the one they give you IVs in. fun fact i was getting an IV removed and i had a fairly new RN (first year on the floor but damned competent. third day on my room and we’d gotten to become friendly. i’m pretty sure she had a family member who’d had a port and had been their caregiver or something) and she had just popped the catheter out of my AC. she pressed down with the cotton ball with her other thumb and… missed. GOOOOSH GOOOOSH GOOOOSH GOOOOSH goes my antecubital all over the room and she turns green. runs out of the room as i slowly and calmly (because i am high as balls on the good hospital painkillers) reach over and put some pressure on. about 30 seconds later she comes back in with a big gauze, i have the bleeding stopped and there were five great big red streaks all across the room. And her now that i think about it i am sure i was so embarrassed i couldn’t look her in the eye. I think i traumatized that poor woman. i’m just like “hey” You really can’t control your instincts until you’ve been through it once or twice.