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Chippys_mittens@lemmy.world to Lemmy Shitpost@lemmy.world · 8 天前

Straight up spiritual

lemmy.world

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Straight up spiritual

lemmy.world

Chippys_mittens@lemmy.world to Lemmy Shitpost@lemmy.world · 8 天前
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  • Nikls94@lemmy.world
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    6 天前

    To keep ther expectations low, everything bigger than an inch is big.

  • PotatoesFall@discuss.tchncs.de
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    8 天前

    • hakase@lemmy.zip
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      8 天前

      Thank you! I don’t need the modern equivalent of laugh tracks to tell me whether or not a social media post is funny.

      • Dicska@lemmy.world
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        6 天前

        Goes in the same category as the ones with the ‘I’m crying with laughter’ emoji.

        It reminds me of one of my cognitively heavily throttled ex colleagues who, when she told you a rather old joke that was even mid when it was new, she would grab you by the shoulders, shake them and keep laughing in your face forcibly to get you to laugh, because why are you not laughing, this is funny, you should laugh.

      • zeejoo@thelemmy.club
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        7 天前

        But then how are you supposed to know when to laugh?!?! /s

        • Knock_Knock_Lemmy_In@lemmy.world
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          6 天前

          Now

          • ptu@sopuli.xyz
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            6 天前

            I nearly spat out my tea

      • Alberat@lemmy.world
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        7 天前

        i do for this post… what does it mean?

        • NoPanko@feddit.uk
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          7 天前

          A medium is someone who communicates with spirits

        • philipsdirk@discuss.tchncs.de
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          7 天前

          A medium is a specific type of psychic who acts as an intermediary, communicating with spirits, deceased loved ones, or non-physical entities. In this case it’s called Dick.

        • NotASharkInAManSuit@lemmy.world
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          7 天前

          Medium is also the name for grifters who lie about being able to talk to or see ghosts.

          • Knock_Knock_Lemmy_In@lemmy.world
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            6 天前

            A midget psychic has escaped prison.

            He’s a small medium at large

    • we are all@crazypeople.online
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      8 天前

      thank you, no one cares about who did what with tea unless it was coming out of ghost dick.

      • MeatPilot@sh.itjust.works
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        7 天前

        I nearly spat the ghost dick out of my mouth.

        • PhoenixDog@lemmy.world
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          7 天前

          Nah you gotta commit and swallow that tea.

          • MeatPilot@sh.itjust.works
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            7 天前

            It’s boo dong tea…

            Ok… I’ll see myself out.

    • athatet@lemmy.zip
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      7 天前

      I was literally just about to do this to the original. Thank you for saving me the time :D

  • Danarchy@lemmy.nz
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    8 天前

    I know an average dick joke but it’s mean

    • foofiepie@lemmy.world
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      7 天前

      Slow clap. Nice.

  • 🇰 🌀 🇱 🇦 🇳 🇦 🇰 🇮 @pawb.social
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    8 天前

    Mourning wood.

  • FinjaminPoach@lemmy.world
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    8 天前

    I got a medium dick. Bitches be writing articles on it.

  • Signtist@bookwyr.me
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    8 天前

    I keep people guessing. Need something big and heavy? Try my dick! Need something short and thin? Try my dick! They both make my wife roll her eyes, so I might as well use them.

    • usualsuspect191@lemmy.ca
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      8 天前

      They both make my wife roll her eyes

      Like my dick!

    • cageythree@lemmy.ml
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      7 天前

      Yea exactly. Both variants are funny in their own way. And I don’t think anybody thinks that someone who’s doing a big/small dick joke is seriously referring to their actual size.

  • melfie@lemy.lol
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    7 天前

    Classic pick-up line: my pecker length is 3 standard deviations from the mean. Wanna find out which direction?

  • TheLeadenSea@sh.itjust.works
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    8 天前

    How do you like girls who make dick jokes about themselves? 👀

    • unalivejoy@lemmy.zip
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      8 天前

      I prefer ladies who’ve won a dick measuring contest

  • errer@lemmy.world
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    8 天前

    Ohhh lordy here come the ectoplasm!

  • RipLemmDotEE@lemmy.today
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    8 天前

    Beverly Crusher has entered chat.

  • toothpaste_sandwich@thebrainbin.org
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    8 天前

    I don’t get it.

    • Soulg@ani.social
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      8 天前

      Spirit mediums claim they can communicate with the dead

      • toothpaste_sandwich@thebrainbin.org
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        8 天前

        Ahhh yes. Now I get it. Not being a native speaker makes these synonym jokes pass me by, sometimes. Thanks.

        • Landless2029@lemmy.world
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          7 天前

          http://medium.urbanup.com/5173593

          Urban Dictionary helps a lot with that.

        • Forester@pawb.social
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          8 天前

          As a native speaker it took a solid three reads to understand it. Medium is correct but not in parlance way to describe a psychic or soothsayer.

          • Soulg@ani.social
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            7 天前

            Yes it is, I will admit that generally the full phrase is spirit medium, but as soon as they mentioned ghosts it came full circle and made perfect sense.

            • Forester@pawb.social
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              6 天前

              I’m not saying it was nonsensical. I’m saying as a native English speaker I read the joke multiple times before I concluded the author was invoking the quintennial meaning of medium to stage a joke. I can see how non-native speakers would be flummoxed.

              A medium is 1 a channel of communication (e.g., television, email), 2 a material used by artists (e.g., oil paint), or 3 a substance through which something travels, such as sound through air. It 4 also refers to an intermediate size between small and large, or 5 a person claiming to communicate with spirits

    • Elgenzay@lemmy.ml
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      8 天前

      https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mediumship

    • Chippys_mittens@lemmy.worldOP
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      8 天前

      Try harder

      • toothpaste_sandwich@thebrainbin.org
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        8 天前

        Choke on a noodle.

        • Chippys_mittens@lemmy.worldOP
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          7 天前

          How?

          • SeptugenarianSenate@leminal.space
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            7 天前

            rather than figuratively inhaling your bowl of pasta this time you just literally inhale as you have it (maybe partially chewed, your choice) in your mouth ready for swallowing. deep pastaful breath. choking reflex should occur automatically (better hope so)

            • Chippys_mittens@lemmy.worldOP
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              7 天前

              I dont think I understand what you’re asking of me

              • SeptugenarianSenate@leminal.space
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                7 天前

                just trying to help in case you were stuck

                • Chippys_mittens@lemmy.worldOP
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                  7 天前

                  What a champ

  • rockerface🇺🇦@lemmy.cafe
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    8 天前

    Mystic Dicky, is that you?

  • REDACTED@infosec.pub
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    8 天前

    Can’t really joke about something that’s hard to see

  • Ceruleum@lemmy.wtf
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    7 天前

    I see dead dicks.

  • ShinkanTrain@lemmy.ml
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    8 天前

    Real Gs do both

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