Oh shit, at long last a job opening I’m fucking qualified for!
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I’m chill. Whiskeys more my jam but I’ll drink whatever.
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Fuckin love industrial.
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I’m so down to do crimes in Japan that ive already done quite a few
In that case, what’s a few more then?
gg2ez
I read #3 in Jeff Gerstmann’s voice.
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You son of a bitch, I’m in.
I wonder what prison food in Japan is like…
cabbage tofu soup, rice, pickles, and kelp fish bone soup.
Honestly sounds better than American prison food. At least this sort of diet will keep you in somewhat decent health.
One of the catering companies I worked for was in the running for a contract to provide food for 3 for-profit prisons. My boss showed me some of the menus he was working on for it and I nearly fell over laughing because he’s doing stuff like “Pan seared salmon with farro and grilled vegetable salad.” Apparently no one had told him the target food cost was 7 cents per meal.
Those contracts are predetermined anyway. It’s all part of the scam of for-profit prisons.
I’ve seen some pictures of inmates food online and the best way to describe is probably “looks like state-sponsored school lunches, except far worse”.
Okay, but only if I’m guaranteed 12 wacky substories a year and the undying friendship of a strangely business savvy chicken.
Just DON’T go to the tour office in Hawaii 😳
I like drawings of flowers as well, I understand this is popular among Yakuza, and I have my own supply of JNCOs. That’s it, I’m joining the Yakuza.
Wait are JNCOs a part of it? I could be convinced if they are. They’re so stupid looking but I loved mine.
I was on the fence until now. JNCO’s, old Tool, and crime? I’m back in my glory days.
Beer, deftones, and TOOL?
Where do I sign?
Japan
Typical… They didn’t list the pay
The pay is free tattoos for life and a place on Japan’s most wanted list.
Throw in an annual pizza party and $5 Wal Mart gift card for Christmas and I WILL DIE FOR YOU
You got a deal, friend. Here’s your pizza.
okay… early nine inch nails…
lol
Dont they chop off fingers as a sign of dedication iirc
I heard it was a way to show how sorry you were for fucking something up or dishonouring your family. You’d present your severed pinky to your boss as an appology. Apparently it’s not done much anymore. I’ve played all the Yakuza games so I’m basically an expert.
I recently watched a great documentary about the Yakuza (on Arte) and apparently that ritual is increasingly considered old-fashioned among the Yakuza, or what’s left of them.
Yes, it took eighty years but they eventually realized making their Yakuza affiliation obvious to everyone could hinder some of the criming.
how else would you show your dedication?
How do you show you are more dedicated than fingers in case you want a raise?
I’ve already given up my foreskin. Is that good enough?
I believe it’s the first joint of one? Pinky finger.
early Nine Inch Nails
Excuse me? The Yakuza got beef with the middle and late NIN eras? Get fucked! I’ll kick your ass for such bullshit! Online! Only…! Online!
What’re the benefits and salary of this position?
Do I need to provide my own Samurai sword, or will one be provided by the Clan?
Just call the phone number provided on the flyer to find out…
Oh
It’s one of those things where a guy knows a guy, and they’ll contact you in a dark alley outside a Pachinko shop.
Hell yeah. Gimme a job looking at uncensored hentai 😎
There are no contact details :(
You just gotta find the guy in the picture and apply in person I guess.
Welcome to the Fantasy Zone. Get ready.
What kind of crimes? I’ll steal a candy bar or Jay walk with yah. I’m usually pretty busy on days felonies are gonna be committed though. Any other day though I’ll help you get that anpanman pero pero candy
Bull fucking shit. As if they wouldn’t also listen to Boris
