I’ve looked up Vanishing Twin Syndrome, and almost every article I have seen said that VTS typically only happens during the first trimester of the pregnancy.
But here’s the catch: My mom didn’t realize or know she was pregnant with me until 7 months into the pregnancy. And when she found out, the ultrasounds did show two babies. Me and my twin.
If Vanishing Twin Syndrome usually only occurs during the 1st trimester, is there a reason why it can happen so late during the pregnancy, as in the case with my mom and my twin? Or is there technically another name for this specific situation?
I’m no obstetrician but something the size and complexity of a 7 month fetus does not get absorbed, it comes out. There is likely some misinformation involved along the way.
No, no misinformation. Everything I wrote in the post is exact what my mom told me about her pregnancy and my birth, and what she told me was what the doctors told her what happened.
Your mom didn’t tell you the truth, plain and simple. Whether she knows the truth, that’s another story. You can’t re-absorb a whole baby, with bones and all that.
You calling my momma a liar‽
He’s saying the misinformation came from your mom or the doctors.
A fetus doesn’t just disappear. Most likely it was given up for adoption or it died.
Why would OP’s mother bring up the ultrasound in the first place if she were deliberately trying to conceal anything?
I could see the twin being stillborn and the doctors thinking it was easier to tell the mother it had “vanished”, though.
TBF, subconscious feelings of guilt often come out in seemingly illogical ways such as this. Not saying that’s definitely what happened, but it’s a possibility not to be summarily dismissed, either.
This is what I was getting at.
I understand that, but i don’t think the misinformation was coming from my mother if that were the case. She told me exactly what happened and exactly what the doctors told her.
My mom is what’s known as an ‘unreliable medical historian’… she very often hears something completely different from what her doctor tells her. I don’t want to say that she lies, because I think a ‘lie’ is a conscious choice that people make… but I also don’t think she’s incapable of understanding what her doctor tells her. I think she just has an idea of what the doctor is going to say, and when it is different she has a hard time letting go of her expectation and replacing it with reality.
I have no idea if this relates to your mother or situation in any way… but if I took everything my mom said her doctor told her then she is the most unique medical specimen ever. Her diabetes is unlike anyone else’s because she can still eat whatever she wants, when she wants… her doctor said that it’s not a problem. And her diabetes has changed from type 2 to type 1. As she was preparing for spine surgery she was convinced that she’d be back home, on her own in 2 weeks (it was closer to 9 months). She swears that the only surgeon that her primary care doctor wants her to see is 2 states over, 6 hours from any of her family (I’ve looked him up, he’s decent, but by no means a unique surgeon). And lots of other strange stuff over the years, including when I was a child.
How sure are you about that? She would know if she gave birth twice, and a 7 month old fetus doesn’t vanish. There’s something she’s not telling you.
The second fetus may have been terminally underdeveloped, and small enough to be delivered without realizing it was a second baby. They may have told her there was no second baby or that it was part of the afterbirth, or she may have misunderstood what they said.
Doctors have been known to lie to patients in the past, but the practice is not very common anymore in most cultures.
Because my mother has never lied to me. So why would she lie about something like this?
That’s how im sure about it. So if there’s any misinformation about it, it’s not from my mother. The doctors, maybe, but not my mother
It’s possible she’s just wrong, not lying.
How do you know that?
Because my mom is literally the most honest person I know, that’s how
Ok look, if you trust your mother completely, and you think she isn’t lying, that’s fine. But people can be fed information they think it’s true and then spread a falsehood, thinking they told the truth. Also people forget and misremember stuff. So maybe the doctors lied or didn’t tell her something. Or maybe she forgot.
Or she at least seems like the most honest person you know.
Like the other guy said, the second fetus was probably very small, so it’s possible that it “vanished”. But for sure there weren’t two developed 7 month babies in the womb.
Which is all great but doesnt eliminate the likelihood of misinformation being the cause. Someone tryjng to protect another from what really happened. Whst does your dad say of the day?
He didnt show up until after I had been born.
So he doesn’t really have any sorta say
That’s a little odd. Is he your biological father?
This isn’t that odd. My father was deployed in the military when I was born
Apologies. I’d misread your comment.
Yes, he is my birth father