Sometimes I cry happy tears when I hear kids having a grand old time playing at playgrounds. That sort of pure joy is so far from my grown-up experiences, it’s like my brain can’t process it anymore.

Women definitely can be supportive, deep friends for men. However, it’s really important that we don’t inadvertently perpetuate placing the burden of men’s emotional support entirely on women.

I’m a woman, albeit not one that cares much for gender (or the divisions society creates around it.) I have relationships of all kinds with people across the sex/gender spectrums (I’m pansexual, polyamorous.) The sad truth is that, for a lot of women in hetero relationships, we become the sole emotional support for the men we’re in relationships with. We’re expected to perform emotional labor for them daily, but it isn’t always reciprocated.

Men who have other men they can rely on for emotional support don’t end up putting 100% of their emotional burdens onto their relationship partner, and trust me, that means A LOT. One of the reasons I’m drawn to polyamory is specifically because it leads to a support network - multiple people capable of supporting each other. Having been the one and only “everything” for a partner, back when I was monogamous, was extremely taxing on me. I have my own issues to deal with, and when a man has no one else to turn to besides their partner, the division of emotional labor can easily become a one-way street.

So you are right - there’s no reason women and men can’t be strong friends with each other. But it is crucial that men reach out to each other too, without expecting women to always be the ones to provide emotional support for them.

I wish I had the permissions to install ad blocks on my work laptop. On the plus side, the kids I work with are learning that ads are to be disliked. When an ad interrupts something we’re watching, I go “booo.” Now one of my students does it, too.

At least I can consider it a form of inoculation - gotta teach ‘em young to resist the ever-present brainwashing attempts advertisements.

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I know tons of white, US-born people who think it’s okay to throw trash out on the street. They know they aren’t supposed to, they ignore the rules because they think they are above them.

Yeaaaaah, no, that’s a tired, old argument that’s been used by xenophobes at least since Irish and Italian immigrants started coming over (and almost certainly has been used long before that. But I’m not a historian.) Just because people prefer being around those who understand them doesn’t mean they’re “shunning” everyone else.

The entire idea that it’s somehow “wrong” for people to hold onto the way of life they’ve always known is really messed up. Nobody needs to do things the way you do, just because you’re their neighbor. My lifestyle is probably vastly different from yours, and if I were to find a community filled with others like me, that wouldn’t mean we’re “shunning” you or trying to change what you’re doing.

Also don’t forget, integration becomes easier with younger generations. You might think the “old waves” of immigrants integrated “better,” but that’s just what happens when you’re immersed in a culture for a longer period of time. Did the Irish and Italians turn the country into Ireland 2.0 and Italy 2.0? Of course they didn’t. They may develop centers rich in another culture, like “Little Italy” in NYC, but I fail to see what’s wrong with that.

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Yeah, just rub it in, why doncha

would it kill you to let her continue in the game?

I mean, technically…

I’m so sorry that shit like that is still happening. As an (as-yet undiagnosed) autistic child, I was in the same boat. Bullies use their “strength in numbers” to have a gaggle of friends agree to lie against a lone victim, perhaps one who’s already known to struggle with emotional regulation. It’s nearly impossible to convince anyone of your innocence when other kids weaponize your weaknesses like that. Maybe you threw a chair against a wall in class one day, and now the school administrators are ready to believe that you’d escalate to actually attacking someone (even though you don’t have a history of hurting anyone. Just inanimate objects. Because believe it or not, some of us do have some degree of self-control.)

I’ve been there, and I know what absolute bullshit is possible for someone like us. I’m livid on your behalf.

Thank you for this.

It’s so simple, dumb, and judging from the dopamine hit, exactly where my brain wanted to go.

Which is weird, because with Lemmy’s small community, all it took was a glance at the username for me to go, “Oh, I know SatansMaggotyCumFart, they’re cool. Which means that comment was definitely sarcasm.”

I work with kids, including a bright little boy who told me that “Why?” is his favorite question. I explicitly tell him that I hope he never stops asking it. His questions challenge the depths of my knowledge and compel me to look up questions I never thought of before. I love it.

I call him my “little scientist.” He’s only 4 and he teaches my coworkers new things all the time. I feel so lucky to get to work with a little knowledge-sponge that’s as curious as I am!

Y’all are still shopping at these places? It’s been over a year since I last went to HD (just before I found out about their pro-Trump donations) and even longer since I shopped from Target or Amazon. Fuck all three of them.

I don’t have anything crucial to respond with, but I like hearing what you have to say. Feel free to go on and on if you feel so inclined!

I love to make a positive impression on the world. I love to empower children, give comfort to those around me, to volunteer my energy and talents for a greater good.

But in the back of my mind, sometimes there’s a little voice that reminds me, “Whatever good you put into the world, your mom can vicariously claim to have created. This will never not be true, because she is responsible for your existence.”

And I hate it. I learned what not to be by observing her. I learned how hypocrites are able to function, how some people are able to override reality with their “feelings,” and how manipulators manage to get their way. Credit goes where it’s due, for sure, but she really shouldn’t be proud of the things she taught me. I became who I am in spite of her, not because of her.

I will always accept more hope. These are really strong points.

There are probably numerous similar bands of scorned professionals working together after being burned by Trump.

I came to the same conclusion. I know how my mom reacts to news she doesn’t like - she defaults to denial. My memory has always been stronger than hers, so there’s no shortage of incidents that I remember, that she has long forgotten. (The tree remembers what the axe forgot, after all.) If I were to attempt to bring things up, she’d deny such things ever happened. Instead of me having catharsis and her having self-recognition, I’d be put in a defensive position and she’d say I’m exaggerating or making things up. Which is to say, attempting to have a serious talk with her always makes me feel worse.

Thankfully, I have siblings, and they remember what our childhood was like. We have all given up on trying to get our mom to see the light. Instead, we have a secret group chat where we can vent as needed.

Thank you! I’m still not ready to hope for things, but this is fantastic news!

This is why I love Lemmy. There’s a recognition that we’re all imperfect beings stuck in this crazy thing called “life” together. It only makes sense to support each other.

my existence is technically “illegal” lol

Small community Lemmy, you’re one of those commenters that I feel like I kinda know (even though I totally don’t. But I seem to upvote you a lot, so you’re recognizable in a good way.) I just want to say, I think this is a really cool fact about you. It’s like you were born a badass.

The only things that could make it cooler would be if you were born with your middle fingers raised, or your first words were, “Fuck the system” (in any language.)