The Last game I played was Splatoon 3. It really depends on a few things, Am I an Inkling/Octoling? Do I speak the language? Where am I? In Splatoon lore all humans died in mass floods, so if I was still human I would probably be studied. Also, if I’m in the middle of the ocean I would be screwed either way. Assuming that I am in a major city or at least near civilization, and I am an Inkling/Octoling, and I speak the language, I would be fine. As for what I would do, I would sign up to work at Grizco, and once I have enough money buy a gun and participate in turf wars to gain money, eventually buying an appartment.
Strange Horticulture…I’m probably fine.
Plus the lake District is like the most beautiful place in the UK so you’ll have nice scenery whilst you grow weird plants.