This story, as written by op may or may not be true. But there are quiet little stories of generosity just like it happening everyday that no one ever hears about.
There are a handful of small good things I’ve done in my life, usually white lies like this, that I specifically never want to communicate to anyone. I don’t want them to be a thing to talk about, because I didn’t do them to talk about them.
Every so often I need to remind myself that I am capable of doing good in the world and I have them filed away in my mind. Especially now that I’m more set in a routine and these things happen less
I’ve done similar from time to time, especially in my trade.
I’m not certain, but i think there’s a belief where doing someone a kindness like that should not be something that you tell them about, or anyone else for that matter–you simply do it…or like in this case, you frame it in a way that you don’t allow them to accept it as charity or a favor etc… The kindness is the truest when it’s simply done and told to no one else. That’s a little treat you keep for yourself. 🙂
There’s a question of morality of if something is good if you’re doing it for something in return, be that just a “thank you” or publicity. To be truly a good deed, the deed itself should be enough. A charitable donation without a name was a donation done for good. One where they wanted people to know that they did it can still do good, but it’s debatable whether the act is good.
you get it. but lots of folks here are so egotistical they can’t conceive of a charitable donation without their name attached… and then go on to be like how that will ‘inspire others to do good’.
the concept of just doing good without recognition or reward just doesn’t exist for them, because what would be the point?
I fully agree! I first picked up a different take on Charity from a small book called The New Sins by David Byrne (of Talking Heads fame, if you’re old like me)… He basically said charity so often comes with certain unspoken strings attached that it could nearly be used as a means of controlling or pacifying someone by doing something charitable for them. It can also be a cheap way of whitewashing one’s reputation. There are a lot of reasons why charity isn’t always the good it can be presented as.
I enjoyed it. It stuck with me enough, i suppose! I’ve always loved his art, and found that to fit nicely into the mosaic of his works. It’s funny, it’s actually written in Spanish as well–you just flip the book over and start reading from the other side!
While silent kindness is the most altruistic, there is such thing as taking it too far.
I used to maintain the strictest secrecy about all my good deeds. I thought acting like a shit person in public would be a nice disguise. Until I convinced everyone that I truly was a shit person, with no redeeming qualities.
Then I had less and less opportunities to do secret good deeds, as people regarded me with distrust and suspicion. Eventually even kindness was received as a sleight. I had to withdraw, and now I can only do nice things when I can cover my tracks so thoroughly that no one will ever know where it even came from.
I’ve gotten myself into a good bit of trouble sneaking around trying to find opportunities to do nice things. Don’t be afraid to be seen being kind.
Not too long ago, I filled my grandmas car with gas thinking it was a nice thing to do and not mentioning it because a good deed isn’t a good deed if you brag? Anyhow she thought her fuel gauge was broken, overflowed her tank and ended up needing the condensers (?) replaced.
I thought that story was gonna end with gramma waving her cane and yelling “She only takes high octane, you little punk! I raised your momma better than this!”
This story, as written by op may or may not be true. But there are quiet little stories of generosity just like it happening everyday that no one ever hears about.
There are a handful of small good things I’ve done in my life, usually white lies like this, that I specifically never want to communicate to anyone. I don’t want them to be a thing to talk about, because I didn’t do them to talk about them.
Every so often I need to remind myself that I am capable of doing good in the world and I have them filed away in my mind. Especially now that I’m more set in a routine and these things happen less
I’ve done similar from time to time, especially in my trade.
I’m not certain, but i think there’s a belief where doing someone a kindness like that should not be something that you tell them about, or anyone else for that matter–you simply do it…or like in this case, you frame it in a way that you don’t allow them to accept it as charity or a favor etc… The kindness is the truest when it’s simply done and told to no one else. That’s a little treat you keep for yourself. 🙂
There’s a question of morality of if something is good if you’re doing it for something in return, be that just a “thank you” or publicity. To be truly a good deed, the deed itself should be enough. A charitable donation without a name was a donation done for good. One where they wanted people to know that they did it can still do good, but it’s debatable whether the act is good.
you get it. but lots of folks here are so egotistical they can’t conceive of a charitable donation without their name attached… and then go on to be like how that will ‘inspire others to do good’.
the concept of just doing good without recognition or reward just doesn’t exist for them, because what would be the point?
I fully agree! I first picked up a different take on Charity from a small book called The New Sins by David Byrne (of Talking Heads fame, if you’re old like me)… He basically said charity so often comes with certain unspoken strings attached that it could nearly be used as a means of controlling or pacifying someone by doing something charitable for them. It can also be a cheap way of whitewashing one’s reputation. There are a lot of reasons why charity isn’t always the good it can be presented as.
I had no idea he’d written a book - is it good?
I enjoyed it. It stuck with me enough, i suppose! I’ve always loved his art, and found that to fit nicely into the mosaic of his works. It’s funny, it’s actually written in Spanish as well–you just flip the book over and start reading from the other side!
While silent kindness is the most altruistic, there is such thing as taking it too far.
I used to maintain the strictest secrecy about all my good deeds. I thought acting like a shit person in public would be a nice disguise. Until I convinced everyone that I truly was a shit person, with no redeeming qualities.
Then I had less and less opportunities to do secret good deeds, as people regarded me with distrust and suspicion. Eventually even kindness was received as a sleight. I had to withdraw, and now I can only do nice things when I can cover my tracks so thoroughly that no one will ever know where it even came from.
I’ve gotten myself into a good bit of trouble sneaking around trying to find opportunities to do nice things. Don’t be afraid to be seen being kind.
Not too long ago, I filled my grandmas car with gas thinking it was a nice thing to do and not mentioning it because a good deed isn’t a good deed if you brag? Anyhow she thought her fuel gauge was broken, overflowed her tank and ended up needing the condensers (?) replaced.
I thought that story was gonna end with gramma waving her cane and yelling “She only takes high octane, you little punk! I raised your momma better than this!”
Nah, I knew that part (also my grandma walks 2 miles a day and has no need for a cane).
Batman? Is that you?
I am the night
You had to follow up the em dash story with a quietly didn’t you?