Look, it’s not “all you can eat.” It’s "all you can eat."

“You” is not the subject noun, it’s “all.” You refers to the group of people. The buffet is open to the public, and any paying member of the public may eat. Your honor, the phrase has been misinterpreted all along. It was never about allowing any one person to eat until they no longer can, but about allowing any paying customer to eat the food offered at the buffet.

I rest my case.

Whoa, that’s a double nostalgia, all the way. Oh my god, whooo!!

“What’s wrong, Doc?”

“Here’s your problem. She doesn’t have any toppings. No relish. No chili. Nothing. It’s no surprise she didn’t last a minute in Flavortown.”

“Damn it! I’ve been a fool!”

Once all of the fuller bottles are depleted, we’re gonna see some exponential growth in the bottle population.

If I don’t have a long enough stretch of time to do it all at once, I ain’t starting it.

But seriously, getting medicated has done wonders for being able to start multi-day projects. I’m learning VBA right now because I want to automate some of my processes at work. I’m finally cool with starting something I can’t finish today. Generally, I want my code to do some fairly specific and complex things. So I’m happy to spend a few hours tweaking a block to make it do exactly what I want, and it feels so good when it works as expected. But before getting on meds? Nah, I wouldn’t even entertain the idea because I wouldn’t know where to start. Medicine helps me draw up an outline of what I want to do with my code, then achieve those tasks bit by bit.

And that’s applied across everything I do. It’s okay to not finish today. But it’s important to start.

I can put my life in danger. I can put your life in danger. But I draw the line when you put my life in danger.

Still got my PS3. What a great console. Uncharted just has no business looking as good as it does running on hardware as old as the PS3 and being nearly twenty years old.

They do, in fact, have wheels.

Source: the humans I’ve seen.

I live in Oklahoma. Everything this man says is true. Real shithole, this part of the country. That and the shit schools are what make the houses so cheap.

If you live in Moore, don’t blink. You might miss the tornado sweeping your house away. Again.

OUR PRICES HAVE NEVER BEEN LOWER!

Them: Be there or be square!

Me:

jk, nobody invites me to things

Elastic deformation is for peasants.

That’s not an apples to apples comparison. I am buying a single thing at a pump: fuel. I boop my card. I stick nozzle in hole. I pull lever until it stops. Vending machines? Second verse same as the first. I boop card. I push button. I take chippies, I walk away. Vending machines specifically are purpose-built for self-service.

I spend maybe 30 seconds to 3 minutes at these things. The only work I do is tapping my payment and pressing a button or two. Groceries are a whole different animal. It’s scanning, weighing, coding, bagging, loading, and paying. It’s a fuckton more involvement by the customer. I don’t think you can in good faith compare self-checkout to a vending machine.

The business is incentivized to trick you into performing labor for them. Part of the cost of my groceries is for someone to have a job doing that. If I’m gonna do that labor for the store, I should get an employee discount, at least.

And why is that? Could it have anything to do with the fact that the business benefits by making the customers the employees, too? Would a business be in any way incentivized to make paying customers also perform labor for them?

The things boomers complain about aren’t always wrong. I ain’t their damn employee.

95% of all life dies

Horseshoe crabs:

He was the Hulk once so I can’t blame you.

Here’s mine. I bought it new in 2015, and I wear it almost daily. It has never needed work.

Our aim is to need this room. Clean your aim. Would help.