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Joined 2 years ago
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Cake day: July 3rd, 2023

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  • Suddenly I’m extremely worried about using lemmy. What’s the right way to respond if something is seen. Call the police? FBI hotline or something? Certainly screenshotting anything to send to authorities is out of the question but as soon as an image is loaded a device downloads it to cache so it’s like a dirty bomb just sitting on your device at that point. I have been blissfully ignorant that anything I use in my day to day would ever share a space with such abhorrent behavior. Kind of not sure I should still use the service, like that has actually been an issue on here before?










  • My experience with a clinically diagnosed narcissist, which is very rare considering, was with an ex I spent/wasted seven years of my life with, and subtly different from what you said. She saw everyone else as superior but unjustly so. Everyone that wasn’t serving her interests was an enemy. The insecurities of feeling inferior to everybody manifested in a projection of superiority but under it all it was just a mask to protect her fragile ego. She would do anything and everything, in the moment of her current environment to get what she wanted. She only cared about anyone in so much as they validated her desire of inflated self worth, her own children included. There was a sliver of hope after a year of therapy but as real as the temporary empathetic soul briefly emerged all it took was a light switch moment and suddenly, like a light switch, that just became another momentary blip to then be used as an additional tool in her toolbox to socially destroy anyone that wronged her. Even after grey rocking her for over two years, following our seven year relationship, did I start getting left alone (luckily her kids weren’t mine, still feel for them but they are taking a master class in manipulation and strategic mood swings). I’m sure she got distracted with her next victim and I no longer fed her need for control and ego building enough so she lost focus but it was the most miserable decade of my forty odd years on this earth. I love her, or who I thought she was anyway, it still hurts thinking back but it was never really her, who I thought she was didn’t exist.







  • I understand the bitching and they are certainly stupid. I get defensive about it a bit because not everybody has the head on their shoulders to separate things, read the online discourse, and screw themselves over. Everyone knows it’s stupid, just play the damn game. I don’t want some junior inexperienced person setup for failure because they got themselves a hot head is all. Appreciate the clarification.


  • That person is an idiot without any actual real world experience. Good on you for sharing useful information. I’ve had colleagues and employees like him lose their job before even being hooked up because of their shit attitude and my advice to folks boils down to the same. Be respectful, be transparent, even if embarrassing (there is nothing they haven’t heard before), and just give your “yes”, “no”. Best case you don’t see them again for 3-5 years, worst case it’s inconclusive and they will run it again a couple times and you will be more used to what’s expected. Go in with a shit attitude with your head up your ass and nobody is feeling bad that you pissed away a salary/job security perk and will never think about you again after a weeks time as they press on checking the box and taking care of themselves.