

I met my wife 40 years ago simply from a casual message that I could have missed or ignored. The thing you have to remember is, it’s not that you had some destiny together that you almost lost out on, but that it’s simply how things worked out, and if you’re happy with it, it worked well.
See Tim Minchin’s “If I Didn’t Have You” song.







Porn hasn’t helped it either. It’s a popular topic but you only see the brief moments and not the after, and like you said, it takes both compatible people AND an agreement on expectations. One person strays from that, and you’ve messed things up for probably everyone involved with each other. I think it would only work if each person cared for the others at the same level, and not one being an “extra”.