Right, I don’t care who the fuck you are or if you’re some kind of NHS consultant, if someone phones you. PHONES YOU! And tells you something like this, despite clear warnings from every bank and banking app you ever had not to believe them, and you believe it, I’m not going to feel sorry for you or blame your other banking app

You’re absolutely the exception, not the rule

Take your tiny-penis truck and leave, there’s a good fella

He’s lying, I saw Track Shovel in a cafe last week and it’s definitely just Dougie Jones in a massive latex fat suit

That, and also the mayor of Paris is on a massive anti-SUV bender at the moment, hiking up parking charges to discourage people from driving them

The judge has probably been told to send a message.

You don’t. Fuckin. Need. An SUV. You. Cunt

Not so much “Tread on me” as “Please stamp viciously and repeatedly on my testicles”

I think the outrage is due to the fact it was a cyclist. You can try driving round Paris and it’ll take years off your life.

Cycling is a whole different story. Drivers respect cyclists and give them a wide berth; they won’t overtake unless they can leave at least a metre. It’s just the done thing

Damn right this cunt should have the book thrown at him

It does if your driving test involved simply navigating McDonald’s drive thru without having a SHRIEKING MELTDOWN then becoming stationary in a parking area the size of a small village

no photographer who included human subjects would be able to make a living.

Sounds great to me! But then, I’m a deranged lunatic from the Taliban

I know! He’s fuckin Scottish. Genetics? He should look like a slice of boiled spam that fell down the back of my gran’s couch in 1987

I tried and it’s just a bunch of legal firms offering advice. There is also a result by the FBI themselves, trying to sell you a copy of your rap sheet lol

Fantastic news for nature documentary makers who are married to taxidermists

gas station sushi

I didn’t know those 3 words existed in that combination and I’m frankly appalled that they do

Christ on a bike, you’d think they’d give it a more succinct name

(Either leave a blank line between lines, or put two spaces at the end of each word)

Brits in Spain -

Anything under €50 doesn’t require a pin. I think it’s going up to 100 soon.

Also our banking security technology is about 20 years ahead due to a simple ruling that banks are responsible for fraud, not consumers. You can happily share your bank details or put them on your website with no worries

You have to be reasonably dim or senile to get scammed

A whole month? You must’ve tried at least a dozen games

Pack em up boys, all games work in Linux

A decade? It was the turn of the century old bean

When I started working decades ago, we were taught how to use bent bits of fence wire to find underground pipes before digging

I literally found scores of pipes that way, and saw dozens of other people do it regularly. It was even taught at a local agricultural college as part of the horticulture course

Then someone told me it was a myth and doesn’t work, so I set up a blind test with a hidden bucket of water and I utterly failed to find it

I simply cannot explain this

The holiday came about because that’s when the potato harvest is, and they needed schoolkids to work in the fields

Halloween has always been a thing in the UK though, it’s just more for little kids

re-evaluate

“We’ll ask the billionaires who are making massive profits off arms sales if they think we should stop selling you bombs”