Beeper is like this, but the list of supported messaging apps is limited. It does have FB messenger though.

https://headscale.net/stable/

“Headscale is an open source, self-hosted implementation of the Tailscale control server.”

Personally, I think you have to realize that you cannot singlehandedly fight every battle. Then pick one cause that is important to you and go fight for that. Get past the overwhelm and take action on something.